After a loooong day at work, kids’ activities, the commute, dinner prep, etc. you might find yourself saying to your partner (at 10 p.m.), “Did I even say ‘Hi’ to you yet?”
Take a stand against the daily grind. If you and you SO have had more interactions like this than you care to admit, it’s time to reignite the spark and just get away. Throw a dozen or so things in a suitcase, head for the airport and leave the thousands of little things that demand your attention behind.
What’s a couples retreat?
If the word “vacation” is a foreign concept to the two of you, you’re definitely normal. According to Project: Time Off by the U.S. Travel Association, over the last 40 years, American vacation usage has declined dramatically. Fifty-two percent of employees reported having unused vacation days at the end of the year, compared to 54 percent in 2016 and 55 percent in 2015.
Really, the strict definition of couples retreat is an organized getaway. Many couples retreats are group-based, with a leader and a specific goal. However, a couples retreat could also just be anything you want it to be, and doesn’t have group-based. (You could have your very own vacation/retreat, too.) Some couples retreats focus on reducing stress in gorgeous natural surroundings, others are faith-based, others focus on improving communication and intimacy, and some teach techniques such as yoga, meditation and tantric rituals.
Pros and cons to getting away, just the two of you
Pros:
- You’ll leave the stress of everyday life and reconnect with your partner.
- You can experience exciting new activities and bucket-list check-offs.
- You don’t even have to spend tons of money. Road trips are just as adventurous as a week in Bermuda.
- Romance.
- You’ll learn, sometimes more about each other.
- Spontaneity: you’ll be able to do what you want on a whim.
- If you go on a true couples retreat, you’ll meet other couples, and you could develop lifelong friendships.
Cons:
- You’ll have to make arrangements for everything back home. Lining up grandparents or other caregivers for the kids, a pet-sitter for the dog and all other small details be a challenge.
- You’ll need to make arrangements at work, organizations you belong to, etc. during your time out.
- It can be expensive.
- You might miss emergencies or family milestones. In some situations, travel insurance is a good idea.
- If you go with a true couples retreat, it might be tough to find the right one for the both of you. That’s why it’s important to do lots of research.
What to look for in a couples retreat
Make sure you’re staying at a reputable resort. Check ratings by other couples. If it has five stars and lots of positive comments, you’re probably good to go. Ask around at work, among friends and family, and check with a travel agent.
Red flags for couples retreats
The last thing you want is your hopes dashed as your couples retreat turns into everything you weren’t expecting. This pretty much goes without saying, but you’ll need to check all reviews. Sometimes you can get so caught up in the momentum of booking a vacation or a specific couples retreat, and you don’t do enough research. Know what you’re getting yourselves into.
We’ve done some research both on strict couples retreats as well as great places to go, just the two of you, to reconnect. Here are the results:
Best overall
Heart Path Journeys
Location: Maui, Hawaii
Cost: About $700 per day
You’ll get a variety of options at Heart Path Journeys, including personalized, private retreats for individuals, couples, families, teams and small groups. You’ll be able to customize the perfect retreat tailored to your budget, your timeline, your needs and interests.
- Relationships (singles or couples), marriage, premarital, honeymoon retreats
- Spiritual, personal growth, labyrinth, meditation retreats
- Wellness, yoga, fitness, adventure retreats
- Renewal, relaxation, spa retreats
There are 3 different retreats : One, five or seven day. Check out Maui’s most romantic hotels to enjoy while rekindling your love for one another.
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Best gorgeous mountain hideaway
Blackberry Farm
Location: Smoky Mountains, Tennessee
Cost: Call (865) 984-8166
While not a “couples retreat” in the strictest sense, it’s still a place you can retreat to with your partner. Fly fishing, archery, horseback rides, a spa, carriage rides: you’ll find it all at Blackberry Farm in Tennessee. Blackberry Farm offers the best of all combinations of relaxation and activity.
Misty mountains that unveil every morning and delicious, gourmet entrees (the Blackberry Farm chef was just featured on Today) that cap off your evenings will make you forget all about going home.
Best for diving into nature
Finger Lakes Food & Forest: A Wellness Retreat for Couples
Location: Finger Lakes, Naples, New York
Cost: $1,375/person for two days
Relax, rekindle, and recharge with your partner at Finger Lakes Food and Forest in an escape to America’s Best Wine Regions. Using the Japanese practice of Shinrin-Yoku (Forest Bathing), each day you will go on guided, meditative encounters in the natural surroundings of the Finger Lakes.
Best for married couples
Colorado Marriage Retreats
Location: Westminster, CO
Cost: Call (303)758-8777 for costs and free consultation
The specifics of your marriage therapy retreat at Colorado Marriage Retreats with Neil Rosenthal, licensed marriage and family therapist, will be hand-crafted to the issues or conflicts in your relationship, and as a result, every retreat is unique. You might work on communication, conflict resolution, trust, affection and romance. Same-sex couples are welcome, too.
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Best for couples struggling with fertility
Possibilities – Lives Transformed
Location: Rainbow Hearth Sanctuary and Retreat Center, Texas
Cost: Call (952) 693-8839 for more information and to get a free coaching session over the phone.
Pradeepa, the coach of Possibilities – Lives Transformed, suffered three miscarriages, three failed Intrauterine Insemination (IUI) treatments and eight back-to-back In Vitro Fertilization (IVF) treatments, all to no avail. Relationship aren’t easy to begin with, and that’s true when you are going through fertility struggles. Pradeepa’s personal experiences can help you along your journey. Located in the Texas Hill Country just about an hour outside of Austin, TX this retreat offers peace to couples trying to conceive.
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Making your relationship a priority
As long as both of you agree (or do a little give-and-take, depending on your interests) on what would be considered the best retreat for the two of you it’ll be win-win. If you both agree that the best vacation would be in a treehouse in Ecuador, a bed and breakfast in Florida or an organized couples retreat in the Adirondacks, go for it with gusto, and your relationship will be better for it.
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